are you sick of washing your underpants every goddamned week? i should fucking hope so what a pain in the ass. wouldn’t you like to just not worry about washing your grimy undies for a whole shitstain-free year? well stick a dryer sheet up my butt because you’re in luck. for just 4,000 motherfucking dollars you can forget about touching that ass-cloth for 365 glorious days. every day is a fresh new day for your hairy butt cheeks. and once 2015 rolls around, you’ll have a years worth of dirty underwear to wash you piece of shit.

You Cannot Rest Here



Have you ever played a video game where you have to sleep to recover? They only let you do it if everything is safe. Otherwise they won’t let you sleep. You’ll get a message, saying “You cannot sleep now, there are monsters nearby.”

Now, remember the last time you just couldn’t get to sleep?

I do.

Don’t you fuckin do this to me

my mind is set on murder L O L

any time i hear of someone whose husband is really rich, my first thought is “so when are they murdering their husband”

i need to stop watching deadly women

you have a rich husband who is well loved in his community? KILL HIM S L O W L Y AND DISSOLVE THE BODY






Marijuana stops child’s severe seizures

more people need to know about this.


This is incredible. Give the anti-weed propaganda a rest. Let’s stop condemning s plant that literally saves lives.

I saw this a few days ago.I find it crazy intresting. 

"my jetpack is busted!’ youre fuckin busted!"

sick comeback, michael


"kids arent being social now a days because of those brain washing phones" what the fuck do you think we’re doing with the phones. do you think we just stare at the number pad. do you think twitter is just a one way text from a robot bird.


when i hear straight people talking





Lana’s eyes are so pretty.

why is grindr in photography.  

Why has no one noticed that this person is purchasing a dildo from Amazon.

literally hundreds of people have noticed

every single note on this post is because someone noticed

Why has no one noticed that this person is purchasing a dildo” shut up




tumblr is like this:


we should be like this:


why would a cool jock like me want to get along with nerds?


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